Sunday self-reflection...

I sit here in front of my computer, a stolen moment of silence and reflection while my children are napping. I have been checking out what my fellow North Country Small Town Americans are writing about in their blogs. I came across Aimless Wanderings of a Fretful Mind (http://fretfulmind.blogspot.com/.) How apropos a title; it goes very well with my mood today.

As I click from link to link eager to read more about our national political goings-on, I feel a twinge of futility. Am I wasting my time? Does what I feel and care about really matter to anyone other than myself? Is anyone going to listen to my rambling? At times, I feel like I am mute--like one of those nightmares when you are shouting, but nothing comes out, no one hears your warning, and the other people get gobbled up by the monster.

Is the Republican campaign my monster?

I cannot fully express how this election has affected me.
I was involved in 2004-- I attended the debates televised in a lecture hall at a local college. I wore my pin everywhere. I voted. I went to an election night party complete with blue cookies and donkey-shaped chocolates. Now that I think about it, we had Bloody Marys that night, which are obviously red--maybe that's where we went wrong--we jinxed ourselves.

My objective at that point was, if I am truthful, simply to get Bush out of the White House. He annoyed me. His condescending sneer and accompanying snicker were too much to bear another 4 years. He talks to the American public like we are a bunch of idiots with a 5 year old mentality.

This time around, it is so much more than that. It gets me in my gut. I am scared for America's future if it stays in Republican hands. The kicker of it all, at least for me, is pride.

My grandfather was a World War I Veteran. My father is a World War II Veteran. Two of my brothers are Vietnam Veterans. My cousin Stephen died in Da Nang in '65. I am grateful to have grown up in a patriotic military family. I was taught from a very young age the respect our flag deserves. I cried at my first flag burning ceremony--the proper and dignified retirement of flags that were flown so much they were ragged, or those that slipped out of grasp and, just for a moment, touched the floor. The American flag should never touch the floor, I was taught.

There was a time, not long ago, that the words, "I am an American," were welcomed, and so was the person who said them. Now, we are looked upon with scorn. A great nation full of patriotic citizens is now laughed at, and it kills me. And as I write this, I am near tears.

It is this blogger's opinion that the GOP played upon people's fears in 2004, and they are doing it again in 2008. They state they are the true agents of change, but they are using the same tired tactics as last time. A large majority of our voting population doesn't have the opportunity to research like some of us. They are at the mercy of whatever news channel they are watching and whatever sound bites may be playing that night. (And by the way, whatever happened to unbiased journalism?) They make their choice based on what someone else tells them is the "truth." Some people rely on their families, some on their church.

Can I reach these people? Little ole me in rural St. Lawrence County? Unless you are a carp angler, no one believes anything actually exists above Syracuse. So, this is where I am at. Am I wasting my time? I suppose I could look at the glass-half-full and think that if I contribute to only one person voting against status quo, I have done well. But, as in most things, that is not good enough for me. I have a voice--I want it to be heard loud and clear. I want those big-city republicans to know--I am not as dumb as they think! I want America to take pride in our jobs and once again feel the delight of job security. Americans should not have to worry about our own government giving incentives to companies that take our jobs to another country. There is something fundamentally wrong with that. I want America to be looked upon not as a global bully, but as a compatriot in global unity. We need someone to pick up the pieces, to rebuild our burnt bridges, to mend our broken fences. I feel that in Barack Obama.

"I am asking you to believe. Not just in my ability to bring about real change in Washington...I'm asking you to believe in yours."--Barack Obama

I believe--does anyone else?

~STA